[W]hose bad idea was this?

I will never understand the French. Even their wardrobes confuse me.

It’s lots of black, all the time. So you get used to that and then all of the sudden you see someone sporting leopard print leggings as pants with insanely high stilettos. Or a pair of those electric shiny blue genie pants, which seems to be a big trend around here lately. You know, the super baggy kind that cinch around the ankle? Ridiculous shoes are a must with these babies.

No. Just...no. Please guys, let's not make
this a trend back home. Unless it already is...

Then there’s the panty hose…oh, the hose! All the women wear tights or hose all the time. For the past 4 months, there's been nary a bare leg to be seen around this place until the Americans started swarming in for tourist season. I understand tights in fun patterns, but I just can’t get past wearing shorts with nude panty hose. It just seems wrong. Tonight I was at the beach wearing a dress and boots. It started to get chilly and my friend said “Well why aren’t you wearing panty hose?”

I refuse to believe that panty hose actually keep you any warmer. Have you seen those things? I can unintentionally destroy a pair of those bad boys in 10 seconds flat. All I have to do is look at a pair and they rip. You can see through them. People put them over their heads when they rob a 7-11 and seem to have no trouble breathing through them. How are they supposed to keep your legs warm? Panty hose...panty hose. Even the name is terrible. It's also miserable trying to put them on, then you spend all day walking around making panty hose swishing noises every time your thighs brush against each other (similar to polyester slacks swishing noises). Or you're walking around all gimpy looking while trying to discreetly straighten them out. It's also best to not eat or drink while wearing them, lest you have to use the bathroom and spend the next 30 minutes straightening the hose back out.

Ironically, nudity seems to be no biggie around here... I came home the other day for lunch, expecting to be the only one here.  Instead I found my host family (boyfriends and all) eating lunch at the table, my host sister just in pants and a bra. On top of that, after seeing countless sunbathers (mostly the older generations) whip off their barely-there speedos or string bikinis right there on the beach, I’ve come to the conclusion that people are generally pretty comfortable in their own skin around here. In the past month I've seen enough...shall we say "mature"...ghastly pale butt cheeks to last a lifetime. So why the panty hose?