What to do with a date? Stuff with cheese, wrap with bacon!

I recently learned that both Chloé and Sophie have a birthday this week. Birthdays are great and all, but I’m not sure what the protocol is for this type of occasion when living with a host family in a foreign country. Should I get a gift? If so, how much should I spend? What do they even like? I’ve only been here for 2 weeks…

Sophie is the one who cooks all of my meals and buys groceries and does laundry. Maybe I should get her a gift. What should I get her? I keep eyeing the Greek sheets in my suitcase and thinking “If only they were the right size!”  

The Greek sheets?????

Back in Maryland my roommates and I just moved from Hyattsville to Beltsville. I got to live in the new place for about a week before packing up and flying over here for the semester. The Beltsville apartment is really great, but also comes with some quirks, one of which is a crazy old Greek woman who is our liaison with the wealthy foreign (mysterious) landlord, who we have yet to meet. This Greek woman’s name is Hope, but I always call her Faith by mistake. Hope is full of funny superstitions as well as opinions she can’t seem to keep to herself.  The first time we met her she greeted us at the door of the apartment (half an hour late because she “forgot” we were coming to see it) and insisted Lori and I both step in with our right foot first. Stepping into a new place left foot first is bad luck.

Second visit to the place was early December and it was freezing. She met us at the door of the apartment and lectured us on the dangers of using the heat. It’s better for your health to breathe in the fresh cool air. Just bundle up!

Third visit was to sign the lease. While Lori and I are talking about something odd we found in the paperwork, she starts talking to Sam about the Seed Vault (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Svalbard_Global_Seed_Vault) and then scolds us for not paying attention, because the Seed Vault is Norway is far more important than signing a lease.

For all of her annoying quirks, I think she’s actually a really nice person. Right before I came over to France she reminded me to make sure I brought my own bed sheets because it would be extremely rude not to. I knew from meetings and emails that the host family would provide all of my linens, but I just smiled and nodded. Also, she claimed, it was really important that I take my host family a set of sheets as a gift, because Europeans love American sheets.

Is this true? I don’t know. I told her I didn’t have any unused bed sheets, and 5 minutes later she comes back with a brand new set still in the original packaging, plus 4lbs of dates. I was not surprised that she had a brand new sheet set and a bunch of extra dates laying around because we recently discovered that she's a hoarder. Her back porch is actually so packed with 'stuff' that you have to go in single file. Anyway, the sheets are really nice and she tells me that all Europeans have full size beds, so they should fit. She also insists that they really love dates because they’re a Mediterranean delicacy. I don’t remind her that I’m going to the Mediterranean. I just smile and thank her. Within the span of 24 hours, Hope had brought us 6lbs of dates. At the time it was just Lori and me at the apartment and neither of us are big fans of plain dates, so we did what any sensible person would do: stuffed them with goat cheese and wrapped them in bacon. I refused to pack dates in my luggage for France. I was trying to cram everything I thought I’d need for the next 6 months into one suitcase under 50lbs. No, Lori, I did not want to make room for the dates. She kept trying to pawn them off on me, but I stood my ground. I’ve already got sheets in my suitcase…what will my host family think of me if I show up with bed sheets and 4lbs of dates?

By the way, all beds in Europe are most certainly NOT full sized. In fact in this 3- bedroom apartment, there is not a single full sized bed. So I’ve been hanging on to the sheets because apart from them being the wrong size, I don’t have the vocabulary or energy to describe Hope (or how I ended up as the mule transporting a sheet set from a bizarre old Greek woman to my new French host family).

Question: Does anyone know if a full size sheet set will fit a queen sized bed? 

 By the way, I took this picture today. I'm telling you, creepy Carnival logo everywhere! Even on the side of the trams now. Imagine seeing that whiz by you every 4 minutes. See how I mistook it for a goldfish?